Bryan’s Ramblings

I hardly ever do this. However, maybe I’m growing a little. No, it doesn’t mean I’m going to go out and rent Titanic, but it does mean that I will probably continue watching Today on NBC in the mornings, at least semi-regularly like I’ve always done. Okay, so part of it is that it’s finally in HD, but unfortunately, the other part is that I liked Meredith Vieira on it…and damn it I wish I didn’t, because then I wouldn’t have to admit it. I mean she’s no Katie Couric, but it is her first day, and, I hate to say it, but she’s likable. I never could stand the The View. It made me insane watching those women yap about stuff. I also thought the daytime version of Millionaire that she hosted was second-class. However, removed from those rotten shows, she’s not so bad.

Let’s give the producers at NBC a little credit here. They knew this was a good opportunity to start filming in HD, and they also knew there would be nay sayers like me who would tune in during her debut anyway. For this they had the segment where they talk about her past and pull you in and get you to respect her and like her and all that. Not too stupid of them. Maybe that’s why they are producers for the Today show.

What does this all mean? It means that I might watch the news more with Katie Couric on at night and Today in the morning. Truth be told, I hate watching the news. It’s not because I don’t care what’s going on in the world around me, it’s just because I usually prefer a filtering system like the Internet or someone I know, so that I only get news on a need-to-know basis. I also generally care more about what movies are coming out and what new gadgets are coming out than what goes on in the Middle East or in Washington. I realize this is shallow and close-minded of me, but I’m a spoiled Southern California kid. What do you expect?

So if you had your doubts about Meredith, take it from me: she’s not so bad. This is all making me realize that the new season of television is here and maybe I shouldn’t just assume that all the new shows suck. They can’t all be as good as Arrested Development, though. I guess I’ll have to record more than I planned and see what sticks with me. Oh well.

Goodbye Summer! … Hello Fall!

There’s so much I could write about. The queue of topics in my head is pretty endless, despite the lack of posts recently. Unfortunately, I’ve decided to let loose about a topic I never thought I’d write about in this space. Yep, I’m talking about American Idol.

I’ve put my foot in my mouth many times before. I once claimed I would never own an Apple computer (my primary machine is now a Mac Mini). I used to discount rap as music and then ended up listening to it extensively, albeit during my college days. Most recently, I’ve ranted about the ridiculous world of reality television (even in this forum), and I have specifically denounced American Idol. I was able to successfully skirt the show even though my entire family is obsessed with it. However, thanks (or no thanks) to my lovely girlfriend, I got sucked in this year and ended up watching almost every episode this season. Worse, I followed the season. After allowing myself this horrific fate, I will make two points.

First, I will never watch/follow a season of American Idol again. My mom claims she says this every year and then watches anyway. I will truly make an effort to not slip on this promise. I just can’t stand the insanity. Regardless of what anyone might say, I contend that it is true, pure reality television – fully producer-manipulated and likely fixed to some degree. That’s easy to get away with and it’s even perfectly okay (see: Quiz Show). Plus, hey, it makes great television…but that doesn’t mean I have to watch it. It’s just such exploitation. I mean the fact that the Top 12 go on tour after the finale, and that the finale is basically one giant publicity stunt to promote that tour just makes me sick to think about, let alone actually have to watch. (Not to mention the performances were painfully bad.) So, no more Idol for me, no matter what you say.

Second, I am going to discuss this year’s results. (Ironic, isn’t it? Denounce it, then discuss it. I’m sorry, this season was an anomaly.) In my opinion, the winner is essentially irrelevant, given that their success or failure in the music industry is yet to be determined. In fact, it’s entirely possible that the “losers” will be more successful than the winner in the long term anyway. Also, who’s to say that America’s votes aren’t entirely meaningless and not just a ploy to keep the viewers involved? We could all vote and then the producers could just determine who to send off anyway. Either that, or they could rig the phone systems. If we can’t even get an accurate count for our presidential election (see: 2000), then why do we believe the guy that comes out during the finale and “validates” the results?

Putting that aside, though, it’s clear that Katharine was a better singer than Taylor, but Taylor was clearly a better performer than Katharine. Over time, Katharine will almost certainly improve her performance skills and Taylor will likely improve his singing (especially with the help of computers in recording studios). The important thing to note here is that none of this matters. Many could argue (see: my sister and my girlfriend) that Katharine had the better voice and thus should have won the competition. I must admit I was sort of rooting for Taylor the whole time because I thought he was entertaining. However, Katharine is a fabulous singer, and she is incredibly gorgeous (one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever seen), so I could not have been upset if she won. However, either one of these people, including any of the Top 12, could score a huge hit single or album. It’s a total crap shoot. The point is, my sister and girlfriend obviously see this as a singing contest instead of what it truly is: a popularity contest. (Not to mention that someone from the south always wins because the people in the south who have nothing better to do with their time all sit and vote for them.)

You can see why this show is not for me. I’m glad I’ve let all of these opinions out so I can finally put this godforsaken show to bed. Man, I miss Arrested Development.

Either way you slice it, there is politics in theater – especially community or school theater. The people who are in the inside crowd nearly always get cast, and you really have to work and “pay your dues” (read: kiss lots of ass) to be let into that crowd. For those who really love theater, it’s of course completely worth it. However, for those of us who consider theater a passing hobby or an occasional creative outlet, it just seems like pulling teeth to get into a show.

When I was in high school, I was in the drama/theater circle, and I started my freshman year – kissing the asses of my teachers and also the seniors. By my junior and senior year, I was ruling the department along with my fellow insiders. We had really worked our way up the theatrical-political chain to the point of truly being the kings of the theater department. We got the leads, we made the calls, we ran the show.

Then, after being the big fish, I left that small pond and jumped into a different small pond (slightly larger) and shrank in size again. In college, I had to start all over – only I wasn’t that heavily involved. I was a Computer Science major; this was the total opposite side of campus, not to mention brain. So I auditioned for one show, didn’t get in, and pretty much gave up. It wasn’t worth it. My career in theater was over.

Or was it? I didn’t do a show again, acting or crewing, for five years (maybe six), and it didn’t seem to matter. Until that fateful day when I said “sure” once and “why not?” a second time and I found myself in not only a small Halloween show, but in the ensemble of a musical. This was one of those rare cases where I was on the inside crowd by association. I didn’t work to get there really, I was just close to the people who did. So I walked right in, until the day that I couldn’t anymore, and I haven’t done a show since.

Now, I don’t need theater as much as some people I know (like my sister), but I have that bug occasionally as I watch a live performance or sing in my car. It’s not that I’m particularly great at it, or that I really even enjoy the false sense of camaraderie that being in a production brings. It’s just that sort of creative buzz that I get from being involved in the whole process just a little bit. I’m too practical (and untalented) to make that a living – but it’s a nice escape from my too practical life.

All I’m saying is I wish I didn’t have to keep playing the games to get involved. I have to start up that theatrical-political ladder again, somewhere/anywhere just to have a shot at keeping my creative juices flowing. That’s why I always ramble about starting my own theater company – but of course, that’s just as much work or more as trying to be a true part of an existing one. So, I’m probably doomed to a life of simply singing in my car, but at least I often have a chorus with me…and they’re more theater crazy than me. That’s a scary thought actually.

Well, I still have my piano, and writing, and softball, and…school, I guess. And work, right? Oh man – I think I need to take up knitting or something.

What the fuck is going on with television these days? Has TV always sucked this much and I was just never old enough to understand? I mean, sure, “reality” (read: “non-scripted-but-producer-manipulated”) shows have taken over during the past few years, and we all know how mind-numbingly stupid every single one of them is. Yes, I do mean every single one. This includes The Apprentice, Survivor, and even American Idol. I’d say these stupid shows account for just over half of what’s on TV these days, particularly in prime time. However, these are not the only shows to blame for the demise of quality television. Formulaic crappy shows like Freddie, Stacked, Hope and Faith, According to Jim, and even “dramas” like The O.C., Everwood, and Las Vegas all get to stick around on our airwaves while quality programming like Arrested Development, Family Guy (for a short time) and Sports Night (from a little while ago) all get the axe. Look, I’m guilty of some of this too. One of my favorite shows is Law and Order, and it hasn’t exactly stayed very original lately. Everything on each of those L & O shows is totally formulaic and recycled. I watch Joey with some hope that it will maybe start to one day appear like the Friends I knew of old (or at least the first three or four seasons when Friends was really at the peak of greatness). However, I watch these because there really aren’t any other good shows on any more.

Unfortunately I know all too well why TV is like it is. It’s really easy to blame the networks, but it’s really not their fault. To me, it’s like blaming the gun companies for making guns or the tobacco companies for making cigarettes. You can’t fault the networks for producing shitty television. The networks are merely giving their consumers what they want. If enough people were smart enough to watch Arrested Development because they understand how clever and cool and comical it is, it WOULD NOT have gotten cancelled. If people stopped watching Freddie because they realized how unoriginal, unfunny, and unbelievably stupid is, it WOULD have gotten cancelled. Unfortunately, PEOPLE ARE STUPID. Even worse, people are getting stupider by the day because they continue to watch this shit on television.

Maybe TV really has always sucked. I mean I watch shows like Full House, Family Matters and Saved By The Bell now and wonder what the heck I liked about those shows. (Saved By The Bell is still a nostalgic guilty pleasure of mine however.) But it seems even with all the shit that was out there, the classic shows from my youth like The Wonder Years, The Cosby Show were such higher quality than anything that exists and can survive today. All the critically acclaimed shows of today like Lost and Desperate Housewives are mildly entertaining and may fall slightly above the rest of the pack. However, it seems like they hold no water when compared to some of the classic television shows of all time.

I’m all for mindless television at times. Stick that stuff on VH1 and MTV and FX and E!. There is nothing better than those stupid countdown shows like The Top 100 Pop Culture Icons or The 50 Cutest Child Stars or those dumb dating shows like Blind Date and Elimidate when you are looking for brainless TV at 11:00 at night. Just put them all on separate channels and put quality prime time programming on the major networks. Unfortunately this means that the networks would lose all advertising revenue to these separate channels because everyone would be watching them instead. So sad.

I’ve pondered cancelling my cable subscription so many times in the past month. What am I paying for 500 channels when at any given moment, MAYBE two of them have something worth watching on. If they do it is usually a Seinfeld re-run or another movie that I already own on DVD. I know a lot of people say “HBO has good stuff”, and I guess it does, but in this age of technology where you can download commercial-free shows from the Internet or buy them and put them on your iPod, why have cable? Just watch only what you want to watch when you want to watch it. It’s even better than this DVR mentality of “what you want, when you want”. It’s now “ONLY what you want, when you want, AND NEVER ANY OTHER CRAPPY SHOWS”.

Television sucks.

There certainly have been some truly brilliant films: The Godfather, Gone With The Wind, The Graduate, Good Will Hunting, and countless others that don’t begin with the letter “G”. However, the vast majority of movies that get made don’t even begin to fall into this category. In fact many would argue that most movies aren’t very good at all. While this may be true, it really all depends on what you look for in a film. Aside from those relatively few celebrated motion pictures of our time, my favorite ones are usually romantic comedies.

I’m not talking about “chick flicks” like the over-dramatic Steel Magnolias or the tear-jerking Stepmom. I’m talking about happy-ending love stories that have some laughs and are scattered with a few poignant moments. You know the ones I’m talking about: When Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, Jerry Maguire, Never Been Kissed, Fools Rush In, Serendipity, and my most recent favorite, Just Like Heaven, among mounds of others.

What is it about these well done romantic comedies that I love so much? First of all, what makes them “well done”? Well, the good ones always have perfect performances, distinguished directing, refined writing and usually contain a superb score. While these are the qualities that any really great film needs to have, there is something else about the great romantic comedies that make them enjoyable enough for me to buy on DVD and watch over and over again.

They are formulaic. While some would probably classify this is a bad thing for a movie to be, I would disagree. If the formula works, why deviate? I mean I like suspenseful movies with great twists at the end like Usual Suspects or Matchstick Men. While those are very good movies, you will never be able to experience them like you did when you saw them the first time and had no idea what to expect. The really excellent romantic comedies never surprise you. They’re absolutely predictable. I can often mouth the lines in a scene of a good romantic comedy that I’ve never seen.

Let’s use Just Like Heaven as a case study since it is fresh in my mind. Serendipity or Fools Rush In or any of the others would work just as well, I assure you. There are so many things I can point to in Just Like Heaven that made me enjoy it so much: the likeable actors, the believable performances, the flawless directing, the touching music. Most of all, however, the predictable writing did it for me. There are so many setups and payoffs that it’s unbelievable. Nearly 45 minutes before the movie ended, I knew how it was going to end. I don’t just mean I knew they’d get together, I mean I knew how and where and why and under what circumstances.

This movie screamed “cheesy!” and had a completely unbelievable premise, not to mention the fact that the entire plot and most of the really funny scenes had already been shown in the previews a million times. But none of that mattered. The movie was brilliantly formulaic and wonderfully entertaining. I walked out grinning from ear to ear and wishing that I was Mark Ruffalo and that I was dating Reese Witherspoon. I loved my girlfriend more. I loved myself more. I loved movies more.

The movie-theater-going-experience is getting more and more painful with extremely high prices, a ridiculous amount of ads and previews before the movie, and more and more cell phones ringing in the middle of the film. However, as long as my favorite kind of formulaic romantic comedies are still being made and produced to perfection, I will continue to overpay to see them in the theater and then later buy them on DVD so that I can enjoy them time and time again.