You email us, and we answer! We are so obedient, but that’s because we love our readers and want to please them. Therefore, if you have a question, we will provide you a thoughtful reply that’s soaked with our knowledge and enthusiasm for all things wedding.
Today’s Ask The Yentas is about flowers. Well, more specifically, about a certain kind of flower. You may have a clear idea of what you’d like your bouquets and centerpieces to look like, but there are many other elements to take into account before making your final floral decision… and deposit.
Hi Wedding Yentas,
I am planning my wedding and my mother asked me to look into floral arrangements, since it is the last major vendor that I need to book. However, when I sent her floral arrangements that consisted of calla lilies, my mother responded that “Jews don’t use this flower at their wedding.” Is this true? If so, do you know why? My color is red, but I’m not a fan of roses, so I thought this flower would be a nice touch, especially since we are getting married in the summer in South Florida on the intercoastal region.
Thank you,
Ilene
Hi Ilene,
Good question!! And thanks for checking with us!
Your mom’s idea isn’t totally out of the blue. Her thinking is not based on a hard-set rule, but more of a cultural and taste type of thing. We assume she makes this claim because most people tend to associate calla lilies with Easter, as they are a traditional flower used at Easter services and gatherings. Also, calla lilies typically have a presence at funeral and mourning occasions. Darker callas, especially, are usually included in arrangements for memorials and related events like wakes and shivas. Basically, the calla lily has been linked to sad times. And with Jewish weddings being such joyous and festive events, perhaps that’s why some Jewish mothers have pooh-poohed the calla lilies.
BUT… unlike fasting on Yom Kippur or staying away from leavened bread on Passover, there is no Jewish rule about flowers, and certainly not one against calla lilies.
AND… there is a way around it if you’re set on the flower.
The Yentas liked calla lilies as well because of the unique shape and texture of the flower. So, instead of having an all-calla lily bouquet, they were incorporated into the bouquet and included roses, ranunculas, dahlias, hydrangeas and peonies. Their puff and texture complemented the calla lilies’ smooth and long shape, creating a playfully elegant bouquet that was feminine and unique. It’s perfectly acceptable to have a multi-colored bouquet if you want to marry your red theme with coordinating colors. Summer in Florida inspires yellows, purples, and peaches as well. Other floral varieties that come in these colors could look great with red callas.
Good luck with your floral adventure! If you have any more questions or would like to chat further about this, please feel free to contact us!
Mazel tov!
Love,
Alison & Nicky
We’re not florists and we’re not even good at gardening. We just know what looks good. So, discuss your options with your florist and feel free to bounce ideas off each other. Also make sure to always voice any concerns about ideas and themes for your flowers so that the final product stays in your realm of style and preference. Just know that you have so many options in colors, textures, and sizes when it comes to designing your floral theme so keep an open mind and break all the non-rules!
