Real Weddings | Los Angeles, CA

Brad and Rachel met in the holy land. He was her counselor on her BBYO trip to Israel when she was 16 and he was 22. She liked him the way hummus likes pita, but nothing happened while they were on their trip. However, it must have been b’shert because three years later, they rekindled their friendship while Brad was visiting the University of Michigan and stopped by Rachel’s sorority house for a hello. This time, sparks flew and they began the romantic adventure of long distance dating. Three more years went by, and Brad and Rachel were finally united when they moved to D.C., and after another four years, they finally got married!  A lot of shlepping, sure, but as they say: Good things come to those who… shlep.

Mazel tov, Rachel and Brad!

Venue & Caterer – Stephen S Wise Temple
Photographer – Mi Belle Photography
Floral Design – Jackie Combs Floral Design
Coordination – Amber Events
Cake – Vanilla Bake Shop
Entertainment – Entourage from DeBois Entertainment
Officiant – Rabbi Vogel from Temple Aliyah
Hair & Makeup – Design Visage

Think Ink

Before your public wedding ceremony, you’ll gather with your officiant and immediate family for the ketubah signing. I’ll talk about this in detail in future blogs, but this traditional ceremony essentially makes the bride and groom officially married. You’re signing the Jewish version of a marriage contract, so it’s important to be sure that your ink will last all the years to come.

So how do you choose a pen that embalms your Judah Hancock into foreverness?

Avoid pens that feather or bleed. You also want to be certain that your ink won’t fade over time, even if your ketubah soaks up sunlight and UV light. Waterproof pens are also a good idea because someone in your family will be crying tears of joy (I have my money down on a mom). Therefore, you should make sure to use an archival pigment ink pen, which you can find at any framing or art store.

Brands we recommend:

As you sign your ketubah, be sure the ink has dried before wrapping or rolling it up. You’d hate to smear your document!

And never, ever use a felt tip pen like a Sharpie because it will bleed into the paper and potentially damage any art on your ketubah. Leave any damages to the appropriate glass portion of the ceremony!

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Images courtesy of Eight20 Photography. Ketubah designed by Rachel Deitsch.

Real Weddings | Camarillo, CA

Bryan and I enjoy laughing and happy times with our friends and families, so we wanted our wedding to reflect our own personalities. The wedding was playfully elegant with bursts of pink and orange colors, complemented by textured flowers (roses, ranunculas, and dahlias), and coordinating paper accessories like dinner menus, escort cards, and programs. The reform ceremony was traditional, and incorporated a private ketubah signing prior to the ceremony, my circling the groom 7 times, the rabbi and cantor’s recitation of seven blessings known as the Sheva Brachot, and of course the grand finale when Bryan stepped on the glass. It was the best day of our lives and we had rave-worthy vendors! On May 25th, we’ll be celebrating 2 years of perfect, married bliss!

Venue & Caterer – Spanish Hills Country Club
Photographer – Eight20 Photography
Makeup Artist– Annie of Blushing Bridal Makeup
Floral Design – Happy Flowers
Linens – Sitting Pretty
Invitations – Celebrate Flowers and Invitations
Cake – Skiff’s Cakes
Videographer – Moonlight Video
Entertainment – Word of Mouth Band
Gown Designer – Casablanca
Bridal Salon – Bridal Elegance
Bridal Jewelry – EmitationsAnna Bellagio
Bridal Shoes – Caparros
Formal Wear – Calvin KleinFriar Tux
Bridesmaid Dresses – Jasmine B2
Ketubah – New World Wedding by Rachel Deitsch
Table Cards – The Paper Stylist

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Here’s A Grape Idea!

It’s a scene out of a movie… or “America’s Funniest Home Videos” depending how sick your sense of humor is.  During the wedding ceremony, a beautiful bride in a sparkling white gown receives her groom’s bar mitzvah Kiddush cup. She looks up at her handsome groom, feels butterflies and blushes over the excitement of the day, and just as she prepares to make contact with the cup, she presses her lips lightly on the surface to make sure that her lipstick stays in tact, and then it happens.

Red wine drips onto her perfectly pressed and clean dress and the crimson liquid continues to streak down every bead and patch of lace like rain drops on a windshield. It’s ruined. The dress is catastrophically ruined and the bride must go on with the evening in a wine tie-dyed shmata on the best day of her life, and no club soda will ever get out this stain.

Do we blame the ever-so-cared-for lipstick? The dashing groom and his distractingly handsome appearance? A faulty Kiddush cup? No. Because if the couple had selected white wine, this would have still happened, but it wouldn’t have mattered.

“But, dear Wedding Yentas, the go-to Manischewitz is red!!”

Not all Manischewitz and kosher wines are red, my young grasshoppersteins. There is white kosher wine and not only is it colorless, it is G.O.O.D.

No really, it’s delicious. You’ll want to stay under that chuppah and get married all evening, it’s that good. Keep it around for Passover and welcome Elijah an extra dozen times. That’s how yummy it is. We were advised to purchase white kosher wine on our wedding day and I’m so glad we did. We didn’t have any spillage issues, but it sure took my mind off any worry that wine would dribble on my dress. Not to mention, it helped make the kisses that much sweeter!

L’Chaim!

Kiss My Glass

On the big day, wedding guests “oooo” and “aaaahh” while bride walks down the aisle in a beautiful white dress. The bride enjoys a shower with important women in her life where gifts come tornadoing into her lap. The bride receives an engagement ring that she proudly wears and presents to all those who gush over the exciting news. But what does a groom get? The groom gets perhaps the most exciting part of the Jewish wedding experience: He gets to break the glass!

At the end of the ceremony, a glass is placed under the groom’s foot and he stomps on it. Word to the wise that our own wedding coordinator reminded my husband: Use your heel!! You’ll get a louder crunch and you’ll prevent any accidents.

There are many ideas and reasons behind this loud and “mazel tov!”-inducing ritual, and it’s interesting to learn some of the most popular. It’s always good to be equipped with a few of these reasons because a) you never know who you may impress at a cocktail party and b) every Jewish individual has heard at least one of these reasons so you’ll be well versed in this tradition.

  • Some rabbis say that this act serves as an expression of sadness at the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. Why do we want to think of such a sad event on a happy day? Apparently, this links the bride and groom, the new unit, to the spiritual and national destiny of the Jewish people.  Jews are supposed to  be thoughtful to “set Jerusalem above my highest joy,” even during one of the most joyous occasions.
  • For a less somber interpretation of this tradition, other rabbis who also serve as comedians the rest of the week (don’t forget to tip your waitress!) have joked that it’s the last time the groom gets to “put his foot down.” Ha. Ha. Ha.
  • More superstitious rabbis might say that the loud noise the glass makes when it meets the foot is helpful to ward off evil spirits. Ghosts of girlfriends past, perhaps?
  • For the rabbi that serves as a gynecologist on the side, the breaking of the glass symbolizes the breaking of the hymen and the consummation of marriage. Yeah.  Don’t share that one at the cocktail wiener station of a party buffet.
  • The breaking of the glass also reminds us that the world we live in is not whole. It’s a reminder that the bride and groom came together to be a single unit, but the rest of the world is broken and needs mending. Just don’t try to mend the glass in an attempt to fix the world. You’ll end up with cuts and that’s no good.
  • The rabbis already have offspring in mind! The tradition promotes happiness as plentiful as the shards of glass and children as bountiful as the shards of glass. Depending on how many kids you want, make sure to tell your groom to stomp softly or forcefully.
  • The last example is probably my personal favorite. The glass symbolizes that, like love, it is fragile, so the relationship should be cared for and unbroken.  It goes beyond making sure the “glass” has enough Jimmy Choos to fill a closet and a dozen pink roses upon the evening’s arrival. It’s about making sure the “glass” enjoys the last bite of her favorite cookie. Or that the “glass” takes a break from the dishes a couple nights a week. Or that the “glass” feels like he has an ear when he needs to vent. It’s the little things that make us feel cared for and special. Because eventually, the chuppah will be taken down and the hora will stop playing, and at the end of the night, you have an empty reception hall and a lifetime ahead of you.  The wedding day is just the beginning of all your special days.

It’s important to always remember this as you start your marriage off with a bang!

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Images courtesy of Sun-dance Photography and Eight20 Photography.