Category Archives: Inside Scoop

Where Do You Stand On Mismatched Bridesmaid Dresses?

Posted on June 10, 2013 by Alison in Inside Scoop, Planning

The recent trend of mismatched bridesmaids is hotter than latkes straight from the frying pan. We are seeing the gals dressed beautifully — differently — but beautifully. Brides have many reasons for encouraging this look, including each bridesmaid’s own style and look, size and body shape, and nurturing individuality instead of a cluster of girlfriends. While it can sometimes be easier to just pick out a single dress in a single color and dress your maids in that uniform, coordinating mismatched bridesmaids doesn’t have to be too complicated. They can still be your team as you say “I do” even if they’re dressed in a way that represents them for the reasons they’re your besties in the first place. And in the end, you have a great vision that comes to life down your aisle.

One Color, Many Shades
Have a view for the hue. You can choose a monochromatic color scheme for the dresses by selecting a general color and then differentiate each bridesmaid with a different shade of that color. Working with neutrals? Try beige, champagne, olive, mocha, and cream. Want something bright like pink? You can do salmon, fuchsia, ballet shoe, bubblegum, and rose.

See where this is going? All of the shades complement each other and belong to the parent color, but still showcase their own individual splash. If you’re concerned about the look being too inconsistent, just remember that your maids will most likely carry identical bouquets or you can gift them a piece of jewelry that ties the ensembles together. Take it up a notch and give the gals the same accessories like patterned tights or a sash tied in a bow.

Different Colors, Same Dress
You can still achieve the mismatched look if all your bridesmaids wear the same dress. How? Different colors! If it’s reasonable to put all the girls in the same dress, spice up the look and include splashes of color. Again, the colors are still complementing each other, but they’re changing a single dress to appear as different dresses.

This has been successfully executed with jewel toned or peacock colors. This concept also works well with pastels. The same dress in baby pink, gray, lavender, and cream would be so soft and beautiful. Likewise, a single dress that’s worn in purple, turquoise, magenta, and midnight blue could be breathtaking for a bright and dramatic look.

Different colors in similar dresses were made famous thanks to everyone’s favorite blogger, Carrie Bradshaw of Sex and the City. Remember her wedding? Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha all wore long, glitzy dresses but each in a different color. The dresses were not exactly the same, but they definitely landed in the same family of dresses: fabulous.

One Color, Many Styles
Another way to change up the individual look of each bridesmaid is to select one color in the same shade, but wear it on any style dress. Pick a color. Purple? Blue? Cappuccino? Great. Now, find dresses that come in that one color. The best way to do this is to choose a single dress designer. Stay within that brand and order at the same time to ensure that your color swatches are consistent. Most designers can accommodate their many dress styles and cuts in one color.

Pick two or three varieties of the dress. Maybe with straps, without straps, and one shouldered. Or long, short, and tea length. Or ruffles, sash, or sweetheart neck. All of these styles are different groupings from the same family. Make sure, though, that the varieties or more or less evenly distributed. The maids should stand out as individual bridesmaids, but not take away from each other or you. Therefore, a bridal party with four short dresses and one long dress may do more to distract than blend, especially if you’re the only one in a long wedding gown. So as you distribute styles of dresses among the bridesmaids, make sure that the same types are sprinkled evenly.

mismatched-bridesmaid-dresses

Want More?
Other ways to spice up your bridesmaids with different looks: The girls can all wear earrings… but in different colors! They can all have bouquets… but with different flowers! They can all wear one shoe color… but in various styles! Pick a theme and then go wild. You don’t have to make every piece different in a bridesmaid’s look, but stay within a range to maintain the vision. The gals in the first picture below are all wearing the exact same dress style and color. Then, your eye catches their ankles and below and it’s like a party on their feet! Super fun. Underneath, the photos shows the opposite: the bridesmaids are all wearing different dresses within the same style and color scheme, but their tootsies are all hugged by the same shoes! Swoon!

So what do you think? Are you going for a mismatched bridesmaid look? What are some ideas you have for achieving this super hot trend?

911! 911! Wedding Day Emergency Kit!!

Posted on June 6, 2013 by Alison in From The Yentas, Inside Scoop, Planning

We should all be prepared for natural disasters — earthquakes, hurricanes, fires — but what about wedding disasters? Hey, they happen. Certain things you can’t avoid… like the best man getting too drunk and telling embarrassing stories during his toast. But there are other small snags you do have control over, and I’m here to help you make sure you’re prepared for bridal emergencies.

Also, I have a special treat for you: It’s my birthday on Friday. I’m turning 30. My lifetime is basically 75% of Moses’s little stroll through the desert. I am SO. OLD. So for MY birthday, I’m giving YOU, one lucky reader, a bridal emergency kit… or what I like to call, Meshugena Materials. Ya know, for when something wrong happens and you kind of go a little meshugena because it’s only the most important day of your life. So, happy birthday to me! Let’s find out about what every bride should have in her Meshugena Materials.

Pain reliever:
You might wake up with a headache or accumulate one from stress throughout the day. Pop a pill of your choice and let your pain melt away. Stock up on a small travel pack or travel bottle and add it to your Meshugena Materials. Headaches can be such a buzz kill!

Band-Aids:
Those damn shoes from your rehearsal dinner might have left a bad impression on your feet. I know, they were Chanels, but still! Beauty is pain and we discovered this long ago. So pack some Band-Aids to smother blisters on your feet or cuts on your legs (eeek! What if you cut yourself while shaving? No blood on the wedding dress, please!). Crossing fingers you don’t to use them, but it would be worse to be without them, dontcha think?

Chalk:
No, your wedding isn’t a crime scene but it would be a crime if you smudged something on your WHITE DRESS (omg kill me now). Did you know that white chalk can cover up any superficial smear on your gown? Pack a few sticks and if you get a grease swipe from the car or some self tanner smudges off, you can cover it with some chalk. It sounds crazy, but it works.

Clear Nail Polish:
It’s unlikely you’ll be wearing tights, but if someone is, clear nail polish helps isolate a snag to keep it from spreading. Also, if you chip your nail, it’ll be annoying that you’ll have a missing chunk of color, but painting some clear nail polish over the area will smooth out the nail so you don’t get any threads caught or allow it to chip further. Basically, clear nail polish is amazing.

Dental Floss:
Stuff in your teeth isn’t cute. Duh. But also, dental floss helps tie up any loose ends. If a bracelet or necklace breaks, you can MacGuyver the jewelry by threading it together with some floss (true story: I did this with my wedding day bracelet that was too big). Or if a button from your bustle is dangling, thread it with some dental floss.

Hair Ties or Pins:
Bobby pins or ponytail elastics are crucial for hair emergencies. You may not be able to replicate your originally perfectly styled hair, but at least you can make sure it’s comfortable and neat looking.

Straws:
You’ll toast with Champagne. You’ll drink water to stay hydrated. You’ll have a DC with your lunch. but you do not want to mess up your lips! Add some straws (bonus if they’re flexi straws!) to your Meshugena Materials so you can drink up AND preserve your punem.

Tissues:
I think this one is self explanatory. If you need me to explain what you do with tissues, then I think we have a bigger emergency.

Tweezers:
A stray hair will drive you meshugena! Include tweezers with your Meshugena Materials.

Breath Mints/Drops:
You’ll be smoochin’! You’ll be close-talking with Aunt Elaine. You don’t want to be the bride with the bad breath. A little mint goes a long way so pick your favorite flavor and keep halitosis away.

Superglue:
When used properly, superglue is really super. It’s the best fixer upper for a broken nail, shoe heel, decorations, jewelry, bouquet doo-dads, and hair accessories.

Basic Toiletries:
Lotion, chap stick, deodorant — it’s a loooong day. You’ll want to keep things on hand with you as you travel from event to event. Touch ups from all three will serve you well and give you peace of mind that you’re moisturized and fresh.

Do you have any additional tips or ideas for our Meshugena Materials? We’d love to hear your wise words from experience!

Want to make me the happiest birthday girl ever and win a bag of bridal Meshugena Materials with some of the goodies listed here? Comment here or on Facebook now through Sunday night at 11:59 PST with your go-to secret weapon for bridal or special occasion emergencies. Winner will be selected at random and announced on Monday, June 10!

Top 10 Tips Every Bride and Groom Should Know

Posted on May 30, 2013 by Alison in Featured, From the Expert, Inside Scoop, Planning

Randy Lehrman is the owner of Real Genius Entertainment, a special events company that specializes in Jewish life cycle events, making every event unique and different while paying close attention to detail and a high level of personal service. With 20 years of experience, Randy uses his personality to drive the party. He also will help you with lighting design, music selections, room layout, and making your wedding exactly how you want it. Real Genius Entertainment is located in West Hills, California and is available for all your party needs!

In this crazy world of wedding event planning, I tell people all the time that these things have become mini-productions. I envision future weddings to be produced like the Oscars or Grammys with staff using walkie talkies and guests giving red carpet interviews. Okay, so I’m kidding, but only a little. The truth is, so many experts go into helping you achieve your dreams of your wedding day and everyone gets to be star of the day at some point. You’ve trusted some of the best pros in the biz to join you on your wedding day –DJs, entertainers, videographer, photographer, florists, caterers — but, there are two more people that are the true celebrities of your special day: You!

For the most part, as an entertainer, I drive a party to its success with the bride and groom as part of my team to deliver the most amazing event it can be. So believe it or not, there are actually many things you can do to make your own wedding even better. It’s really the difference between good and optimal. Follow this Top 10 List and you might float to your honeymoon on Cloud 9!

#1. Dance! That’s right. Even if you and your spouse are as stiff as boards you need to dance and participate on the dance floor. Why did you hire an awesome DJ for your event? To get people dancing all night! But, if you and your new partner are at the bar all night or yapping outside, how do you expect everyone else to get out there? Lead by example. You are the hosts. Monkey see, monkey do. And you guys are the two best dressed monkeys there!

#2. Know when to schmooze! With only a certain amount of time to visit and thank all of your guests, you usually rush around like little bees to thank them, which is very kind of you. But doing it at the right time can be a scheduling nightmare in itself. So my advice to you is to make sure you eat first (you get fed first anyways) and then there is time go chat and thank. You might also have schmooze opportunities at cocktail hour, salad, dinner, and cake cutting to say thanks! And remember, some of your best conversations might be on the dance floor!

#3. Work with your DJ! Don’t be your own! Of course you want your favorite music at your party. Many brides and grooms are focused on their taste in music instead of thinking of dance music. Use the expertise of your DJ to pick music for dancing. If something you like doesn’t work for the dance floor, it shouldn’t be a problem. Utilize it instead as background music during the meal, or as people enter the party. Green Day isn’t going to fill a floor no matter how much you like it.

#4. Don’t play your montage during dinner. Ninety-nine percent of all weddings are four to five hours long. If you are showcasing pictures of the two of you, the worst thing you can do is play it while your 200 guests are cutting chicken. Allow dinner time to be a time to relax and socialize. Set up the slideshow during dinner and after all the plates have been cleared, voila! It’s showtime! It will ensure you have all of your guests’ attention on something that is very special to you.

#5. More sugar! Have a secondary dessert if you can. The longest lull in the party is when the caterer is slicing cake for each and every one of your guests. I suggest having a candy or extra dessert table. That way after you’ve cut the cake, you can send your guests to that goodie table to nosh, and by the time they get back to their table there’s cake there, too!

#6. Bring money! Even if you leave cash or a check with your coordinator, you never want to run out of green. Many DJs require overtime payment on the spot so if you want to keep dancing the night away, have your coordinator take care of that for you. There is literally one instance at every party where you will need some kind of money for someone, whether it’s a tip or overtime. Count on not needing to pay up, but be prepared just in case, and make it easy on yourself.

#7. Beware of offsite photos. Out of the 20+ years of weddings I have worked, one thing has remained constant: when a photographer requests to take the bride and groom off-site for photos, the couple never returns on time. Try to avoid doing this at all costs because guests have already been there a long time and when your doors open they expect to see you introduced within fifteen minutes. If you aren’t at the beginning of your own party it will be uncomfortable for everyone there. We cant start without you, right? You can also schedule a photo shoot with your photographer where you get all dolled up again and take photos at a cool location or favorite spot. Bottomline, take as many photos as you can before the ceremony or the reception. You will be glad you aren’t late to your own party!

#8. Eat! You should get your plates before other guests, so take advantage of this and eat. This is a long and special weekend. You need lots of energy while dancing, chatting, and just meeting new family. Eat and drink water to keep yourself going. The number of times I’ve seen a bride or groom not eat before or during an event? Six. The number of times one of those people has fainted or thrown up? Six. Do the math.

#9. Inform your special VIP guests. All too often there is a mother-son dance where mom is floating at the bar, or there’s the emotional cousin who has just been asked to — surprise! — give a toast and had no idea. Tell your toasters, tell your dance partners, tell the people who are doing the motzi over the challah. Tell all your VIPs that you are honoring them with a special duty and then they’ll be prepared and excited about what they are doing.

#10. Have fun! If you have fun at your own party everyone else will, too! Don’t sweat the small stuff at your wedding reception. All too often, brides become upset over just one song they might not particularly like and and then not even realize that the dance floor is packed. Trust your DJ, smile, take pictures, kiss your new partner, and enjoy the best day of your life.

Tom Nicholls Photography

A Mother of the Bride’s Perspective

Posted on May 6, 2013 by Alison in Inside Scoop, JDate, Jewish Traditions

Remember beautiful Dara and handsome Michael’s Kansas City Jewish wedding from a couple weeks ago? Well, Dara’s mama has something to say about her daughter meeting the man of her dreams and the wedding day that came to be! It’s always so special to have a new point of view and there’s nothing like the view of our (Jewish) mothers!

***************************

A Jewish Doctor!! Thank You Mom and JDate!

Wichita, Kansas isn’t exactly the Jewish dating mecca, even if you have the most wonderful daughter in the world. I’m not knocking Wichita. There is a nice, small Jewish community, but at the time most of the members were older, married, or still in elementary school, and the few Jewish boys she grew up with were more like brothers than perspective love interests.

Dara’s dad and I were hopeful she would find a Jewish man at KU, but it didn’t happen. Again we were hopeful when she moved to Kansas City, but each time she brought a boy home we began to realize this was not happening, and she made it very clear she had no interest in joining JDate.

My mother, Dara’s grandmother, passed away in May 2009. We were sitting shiva at my brother’s home on Long Island. Towards the end of day three, my brother’s friend engaged my daughter in conversation in an effort to set her up with his nephew. To pique her interest, he wanted to show her his photo on JDate. My niece powered up her computer, loaded the JDate website, and as she was handing the laptop to my daughter, a free membership sign flashed across the screen. In unison, we burst into laughter and screamed that it was Grandma at work already. Dara joined JDate that day, and the rest is history.

I loved Michael from the moment I met him. He was warm, confident, intelligent, possessed a sense of humor, and when he came to NY for Thanksgiving, it was as if he had been part of our family right from the start. My daughter was blessed! She had met a wonderful man with an amazing family that adored her and she adored them right back. Upon meeting them for the first time, I understood why. When my best friend asked me, “So what are they like?” I answered, “I would want to be friends with them even if they weren’t Michael’s parents.” To which she responded, “Wow! That’s wonderful.” Wonderful is right!

About a year later, Dara and Michael were engaged. It was a match made in heaven. My daughter was not only going to marry a Jewish man, but a Jewish doctor! I will never forget the day my daughter called:
“Hi Mommy, are you sitting down?”
“Yes, why?”
“Michael asked me to marry him! I said ‘Yes!’ WE’RE ENGAGED!”

What followed was a whirlwind of planning, shopping, tasting, trying, calling, crying, laughing, stuffing, mailing, eating (best tasting wedding cake ever), fitting, starving, AKA, the best mother-daughter time ever!!

I would describe the search for “The Dress” to be, at first, exhilarating, quickly going from confusing, to what we described as wedding dress blur. You know when your daughter has tried on so many dresses, each one looking more fabulous than the next but not quite “The One” and they all start blurring together and you can’t remember which one has which detail? Well, I kept asking Dara, “How do you feel in it?” and from the top of Mount Wedding Dress Blur, Dara yelled “Why do you keep asking me that? I don’t know what you mean. I feel like I am trying on wedding dress. How am I supposed to feel? Please stop asking me that.”

And then… Then that magical moment happened. She stepped out of the dressing room and we looked at each other both knowing this is The One and the tears began to fall. I know every mother thinks their daughter is the most beautiful bride, and that is the way it should be, but my daughter really was.

There are no words to describe the flood of emotion as I watched my daughter marry her new best friend. Dara and Michael were so happy, the way they looked at each other, we knew everything was going to be OK. I have never seen a couple have as much fun during their wedding ceremony as Michael and Dara. It was a spectacular event, and would have given us enough memories to last a lifetime, but we were not finished.

Although, Michael was born in the United States, his parents were born in Israel, and still have many close relatives and friends living there. Many of them were unable to attend the wedding in Kansas City. Michael’s parents, with the help of his fabulous aunt and uncle, made a second wedding reception in Haifa at the Dan Carmel Hotel, overlooking the Mediterranean Sea.

It was a stunning affair, truly fit for royalty as approximately 200 family members and friends came to wish the newly married couple much “nachus” and to share in this joyous celebration of love.

So, I end as I began, with gratitude for bringing this incredible man named Michael into my daughter’s heart and head, a man who values family as much as he does life, who calls me “Mom,” and makes me happy to have another fabulous son, but most importantly, who adores my daughter and strives to make her happy everyday.

Thank you Mom, thank you JDate.

Respectfully submitted by,
Barbara Rose

Your Wedding Photos Last A Lifetime

Posted on April 24, 2013 by Alison in From The Yentas, Inside Scoop, Jewish Traditions

As many friends of The Wedding Yentas community know, my grandfather passed away on April 3 and even though it was expected and he was 92 years young, it’s still a difficult and sad time for my family. He was an accomplished man who ran a successful business, was a father to three daughters, loved his five grandchildren, and enjoyed his three great grandchildren (one of them is Baby Yenta!), indulged in chocolate, cheered on his favorite baseball team, and kept an orderly and organized home.

He lived a very full life. He served as a mail carrier in the army during World War II and was involved in some of the most historic battles and landmarks. He traveled extensively and was extremely philanthropic, especially in the Jewish community and within the synagogue he heavily funded.

If there’s one thing the Jewish people know how to do, it’s a funeral. Two days after my Grandpa passed away, all the people who loved him — and it was a lot! — filed into the chapel of a well-known Los Angeles Jewish memorial park. After some Jewish prayers, heartfelt eulogies, and an Honor Guard that presented my Grandma with a commemorative flag for her fallen soldier, it was all over and everyone caravanned back to the home my grandparents shared to partake in — no surprise here — a perfect and delicious deli spread. The remainder of the afternoon and evening was a wonderful party filled with good conversation and good food, an event my Grandpa would’ve definitely enjoyed. The Jews do it right: mourn, bury, eat. It’s comforting, socially and emotionally.

Besides the people, the one thing that traveled from the funeral to the “after-party” was a science fair-like poster board filled with photos from my Grandpa’s life and the people who loved him. I love looking at the photos of him as a strapping young man in the army, near the age he met my Grandma. I also love revisiting memories for which I was present in photos that memorialize him the way I remember him as a little girl.

And even with a rich life of experiences and crowds of loved ones, what’s that one photo in the middle of the poster board?

His wedding photo.

Taken April 20, 1947 by a now unknown photographer, never blogged, never shared on Facebook. This photo is the center of a poster board which is meant to recap his full life. Without even strategizing or analyzing, it was understood that the most important photo to represent his life as we knew it was the photo that showcased him next to his bride, my Grandma.

People, this is important: why am I telling you about my Grandpa who passed away? Because your wedding photos will be a recap of what’s considered the most important day of your life. You will have many important days: the day you get promoted at work; the day you run your first marathon; the day you receive the key to the house you just bought. And if there is a camera available on those other important days, will the output of the camera be at the center of your funeral science fair poster board?

It’s no secret I’m a wedding junkie and I’m lucky enough to review hundreds of weddings a year to publish on The Wedding Yentas. I have many friends in all fields of the wedding industry. I love flowers like the next girly girl and I think music makes or breaks your party. But let me be real for one second: your photographer better be good. You must love your photographer so that you are comfortable getting all nakey-nakey before you put on your dress and feel totally cool with kissing your partner a zillion times throughout the day on camera. You have to adore your photographer’s work and trust the technical and artistic credentials that sealed the deal for you. Do not try to save money on your photographer. Save money elsewhere. Or, choose a photographer within a reasonable budget. But do not hire a photographer based on dollar signs — or lack thereof — alone. Choose your photographer because you are obsessed with your photographer. Hire a trained professional who specializes in weddings (and bonus points if he or she has shot Jewish weddings!). Be absolutely sure that any money exchanged buys you the most phenomenal wedding photos.

What I love most about my grandparents’ wedding photo is that it could be anybody, really. Go look at your grandparents’ wedding snapshots. I bet they look just like mine. There are variations on the location and the dress, of course, but I think that’s the special part about Jewish families: everyone’s photos look the same; the people are just swapped out. Is that my Aunt Frieda or yours? Who knows. All Uncle Louises look alike.

I love my grandparents’ photographer because he captured them in a magical time during which all members of The Greatest Generation seemed to sparkle. That “I just got back from war not too long ago and I am ready to conquer the world with this pretty lady by my side” look. There was no Photoshop. There was no Instagram. There was no blogging. It was just a photographer, his camera, and his subjects. And from that came a handful of photos of a young couple in love.

That young couple aged and the bride remains with us. The groom, that handsome son of immigrant parents groom, is no longer alive, but his face lights up the photo the way it did throughout his whole life.

One day, you’re going to die. There will be a deli platter. And hopefully, right smack in the middle of a science fair poster board, there will be a photo of you and your life-long love taken on your wedding day by the best photographer you knew.