Category Archives: Jewish Traditions

The Big Chair Lift

Posted on December 13, 2012 by Alison in From the Expert, From The Yentas, Jewish Traditions, Planning

The Chair Scare: The feeling of butterflies about going up in a chair a handful of feet above the ground while holding onto a napkin, grinning with clenched teeth through the tight corset of the wedding dress during a series of bounces and hollers from the crowd.

Sound fun?

It doesn’t have to be scary. The tradition of going up in the chair is a festive and fun part of the reception’s Hora dance and some of you are a little fearful of going up and enjoying this custom.

Photo by Solar Photographers

Your wedding is around the corner, and everyone tells you that the fun part is the reception where you and your soon-to-be husband will go up in the chair. Only problem is, you’re afraid of heights or you hate roller coasters or you’re worried about dropping the napkin. And, most importantly, What if you fall off the chair? Are you thinking of avoiding the chair lifts all together?

If you are feeling The Chair Scare, hopefully you’ll gain some peace of mind here.

This is supposed to be a fun tradition and definitely not something that causes you stress. First, make sure that your venue or wedding coordinator set aside two arm chairs for you. There should be two chairs with arms. Make sure the chairs have arms. You should use arm chairs. Is the point clear? This gives you something to hold on to and provides your body with boundaries as you become (lightly) jostled around.

Also, there are no rules! Just hop in the chair, hold on, and enjoy the ride. Someone will probably toss you a napkin to hold with your new partner and if you drop it through all the excitement – meh! – so what! The napkin isn’t a Torah; it’s okay if it falls. Many couples do and they lived happily ever after.

Before you plop down on the chair, remember to do a quick smooth-out on the tushie part of your dress. That way, if you have any beading or details on your dress, you won’t be uncomfortable from getting them lodged in nooks and crannies when you sit on them. The more comfortable you are, the more you can relax, and the less afraid you’ll be. See? It all comes full circle.

If you’re wearing a short dress or a tea length dress, cross your legs at the ankles. You are a married woman for goodness sake! You don’t want all those eligible bachelors to get a free show! Be a lady and make sure the tops of your feet touch each other.

You don’t have to stop eating for two weeks before the wedding. Give some strong men a heads up about the chair lift portion of the Hora and they’ll carry you like you’re Tinkerbell. Do not be afraid of being dropped. With four legs on the chair and at least one man per leg, it’ll be easy for the strong men to balance you. Perhaps in the days leading up to the wedding, call some of the men you’d like to be your chair lifters and give them advance warning that they’ll have this duty at your reception. That way, you can relax knowing that this very important task is handled and you don’t have to worry about it during your ketubah signing, aisle walk, circles, wine blessings, photos, and schmoozing that all take place during the Wedding Olympics.

Remember, the Hora is a joyous and happy part of the wedding reception. So as you are six feet off the ground and literally high on life, look at your husband who is up there with you and know that together you’re on top of the world. Then, look down, and enjoy all of your favorite people singing and clapping and loving you right back.

Photo by Mi Belle Photography

Custom Color Your Ketubah

Posted on November 12, 2012 by Alison in Featured, Jewish Traditions, Planning

Has this happened to you? You find a ketubah that you both agree on, the wording meets your marriage ideals, the price is right, you know exactly where you want to hang it and… oh wait. The colors don’t match the room.

Womp womp womp.

Buzzkill ketubahs are everywhere. And it’s no surprise. With ketubah art being such a personal thing, it’s not a shocker that your choices are narrow when you look at all the specs. So many ketubah shops and independent artists offer a wide variety of ketubah pieces, but once you consider the style of art, your choices get smaller. Then your price range. Slimmer options. Then your ability to customize your text or not. Narrow. And what you’re left with is a handful of “well, we don’t hate ’em” ketubah possibilities. And of those, what if the colors are not your cup of tea?

More and more ketubah art is becoming customizable and I think that’s great. Here’s something so personal and so unique to a couple’s marriage, they should have the ability to be tailored for the newlyweds.

I’m currently loving New World Ketubah by Rachel Deitsch‘s custom concept that stays true to her own artistic style, while accommodating her couples’ wall paint or furniture. Or, even, just taste.

The piece itself is called “Branches” and it’s the perfect blend of modern and traditional. With clean and simple detail, and without blatant Jewish symbols or landscapes, this ketubah could fit the style range of an interfaith couple to a super traditional couple.

Consequently, the simplicity lends itself to all kinds of color combinations so the couple can really direct the mood of the artwork. When it comes to choosing a color, deciding what sort of “mood” you’d like to express should come first. Do you want to reflect the season the wedding takes place, for instance, or a time of year that is special to you as a couple?

The best bet for color-matching would be getting the PMS Process Color (CMYK) formula from your invitation printer if you are trying to match the invitations. Be aware that color can shift from printer to printer and even from paper to paper, but Pantone colors are the best way to get your closest match. You can also send a paint chip, matte finish. Once the two color formulas are in place, Rachel will email you an image before printing.

There are a lot of ways to play with this, so be open minded! For example, Rachel personally likes a seasonal reference, so her initial collection of four color themes are nods to winter (gray and a pop of red), summer (sky blue) spring (lavender) and fall (orangey yellow). The best part is that there’s no wrong answer and the fun is seeing what couples can come up with!

Unlike other custom ketubah collaborations, Rachel’s is currently no extra cost. It’s just the price of the ketubah. Save your gelt for Chanukah, friends!

Oh, and P.S., Rachel also creates invitations! The fun just never ends!

Follow New World Ketubah on Facebook to keep up with the news and updates!

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Honoring Friends & Family With Wedding Day Duties

Posted on October 18, 2012 by Alison in Inside Scoop, Jewish Traditions, Planning

This is a very good problem: You have childhood pals you’ve known since nursery school and you have sorority sisters from your time away at college. You have a cousin who’s like your clone and you have high school friends who you are still in close touch with. And then you and your partner both have siblings and they’re also in your inner circle. Poor you! You are loved by too many people and you can’t possibly have them all in your bridal party. Well, you could, but not only would your processional be longer than your ceremony, but your photographer might kill you. (Am I right, photographers?)

First, pick your bridal party. This may be difficult because you really have to narrow down your fan club, but check out this post that may help you feel better about it. After you’ve secured a reasonable amount of bridesmaids and groomsmen, then think about who else you’d like to honor with VIP status.

Is one of your favorite people a good singer, speechmaker, or musician? Ask them to “perform” at some point during your wedding weekend. You may ask someone close to you to give a speech or sing a song at your rehearsal dinner. There might be a point in the ceremony that someone could recite your favorite poem, or sing as you walk down the aisle. Someone special could also do the motzi over the challah or the Birkat HaMazon, the blessing after meals, thanking God for the food and His support in general. You’ll want to limit the amount of speeches during your reception (too many makes it a snoozer!), but think of other special times during your wedding events that can include putting your favorite people in the spotlight.

Pick your ketubah signers! Typically, there are two of them, and this is a huge honor. Their signatures will be on your beautiful ketubah forever and if you choose to hang it in your home, you will be reminded of these people whenever you look at it. They are invited into the room where you sign the ketubah and this is usually a private event before the chuppah ceremony. I’ve personally signed the ketubah twice for my two best friends and it was a joy to be part of the official Jewish marriage portion of the day. Remember, the ketubah signers must be Jewish and not be blood relatives. Your ketubah signers should be able to tell your rabbi or cantor their Hebrew names, and can receive help on the wedding day if the ketubah calls for writing their name in Hebrew.

Choose your marriage license witnesses. These can be the same people as your ketubah signers or you can extend the honors to two separate people. These people don’t have to be Jewish and are there to sign the marriage license that you must have with you on the day of your wedding. Your officiant should mail it in for you, and after the wedding, you should receive the certificate of marriage, but you’ll need two witnesses. This is also a really big deal for the signers since the document makes the marriage official in “the system.”

For fellas who are close to the bride or groom, there is a job for them that makes them some of the most popular men at the party. Designate some hefty dudes to hold you two up in the chair during the Hora. This doesn’t always have to be an invitation-only ritual, but it might be a fun way to honor some men who didn’t make it into the wedding party. Plus, they’ll be in all the fun photos of the chair lifts!

There are always the more job-like honors: ceremony ushers, guestbook facilitators, and escort cards host. These really are more like tasks, though, so think long and hard if it’s more of an honor or a chore for the people you ask to do this. Depending on the size of the wedding, and the style and locale, you may or may not want to ask people to do this. Sometimes it’s not necessary, but you know your wedding and your friends best, so make the decision based on the facts. These are just last-ditch ideas.

Think outside the box, too! Perhaps there are fun and unique details you’re choosing to include in your wedding day. Ask yourself how you might weave in your favorite people to honor them and then create an exciting way to ask them. Hopefully, this solves your terribly unfortunate problem of having so many wonderful people in your life!

Real Jewish Weddings | Los Angeles, CA

Posted on October 17, 2012 by Alison in Featured, Jewish Traditions, Real Jewish Weddings

Today’s Real Jewish Wedding is a submission from the couple’s super talented cinematographer, Ahava Films, who expertly tells the wedding day story through moving pictures and sound.

Many people talk about the revival of downtown Los Angeles. The setting of Lauren and Daniel Packer’s wedding shows the beauty and diversity of the L.A. downtown environment. From the portrait session where we toured the various sites of downtown LA to the outdoor ceremony surrounded by massive buildings, the feeling is at times humbling and yet energizing. Lauren and Daniel were on fire the whole day, from the moment makeup was applied to the last dance ending with Daniel carrying Lauren off to a romantic “happily, ever after” ending. While John Solano and team were rousing the wedding party for high-energy photos, Ahava Films was putting together a cinematic masterpiece to delight all the senses. Adding meaning to the day was the charismatic Rabbi Shlomo Seidenfeld who has known Lauren since she was a toddler. And leave it to Nefesh Music to add soulful music to the wedding ceremony, and a rockin’ hora/dance set for the reception.

Mazel tov, Lauren and Daniel!

Lauren + Daniel from Ahava Films on Vimeo.

Photo stills from the Ahava Films masterpiece:

los-angeles-orthodox-wedding

Video: Ahava Films
Reception Venue: Omni Los Angeles Hotel
Photographer: John Solano Photography
Music: Nefesh Music
Makeup: Zulica
Wedding Dress Salon: Marylinn’s Bridal Salon
Floral arrangement/Chuppah Decoration: Elegant Thorn

Armed With Love

Posted on October 16, 2012 by Alison in Featured, Jewish Traditions, Planning

One of the main differences between a traditional Jewish wedding and a non-Jewish wedding is the wedding processional. A Jewish wedding needs a little wider of an aisle to accommodate the bride and groom as they walk down the aisle… with their parents.

It is a Jewish custom that both the mothers and fathers of the bride and the groom walk their children down the aisle. Naturally, if a parent is deceased or if there is a step-parent situation unique to the wedding occasion, that’s a different story and one to discuss with your partner and rabbi.

We love this beautiful tradition, as a child is still a child, even on his or her wedding day. Together, the parents raised the child to become an adult who is now taking on the mitzvah of marriage. It’s so nice that the groom doesn’t make the walk alone down the aisle; his parents showed him the way to be a man and on his wedding day, they show him the way to meet his bride under the chuppah. Likewise, the relationship between a mother and daughter is so unique and special, that it’s only fitting that the mother joins the father as they both link arms with their daughter in her wedding gown.

These are the tender moments that always send me to a waterfall of happy tears every time I attend a Jewish wedding. Here we’ll share with you some of these priceless, milestone moments. The photos give you a peek into this miraculous and lovely relationship between parents and their children. While I love looking at the the beautiful aura of the bride or the dashing and in-love groom, admiring the parents during one of their proudest moments gives me goosebumps! Grab a hankie!