Category Archives: From The Yentas

Most venues are clean canvases that don’t have much personality. I’m not saying they’re ugly or cold. But they’re… generic. Let’s face it, no venue was built with the two of you specifically in mind. You choose the venue because you feel like you relate to it enough. But does it relate enough to you?

You can’t recarpet or repaint or relandscape your wedding location, but you can sprinkle bits of your personalities — your… “ness” — to make it unique and relevant to you and your worlds that come together to celebrate you.

How?

Signs!

Fun, cute signs that match your style and decor are fairly inexpensive and easy ways to personalize your wedding venue; low hanging wedding fruit, if you will.

First, there’s the “pick a seat, not a side” signs. We discussed this a while back, that many couples are choosing to make sure their guests know they don’t have to sit on one specific side at the ceremony since both families are coming together. There are super cute ways to get this message across.

If your wedding venue has a lot of rooms or large grounds, it might be helpful to have direction signs to point your folks toward the important stuff: ceremony, reception, um… booze.

You can also personalize these signs further by including your logo on them if you’ve created one. It’s also a chance to take advantage of utilizing your wedding colors or other unique stylings.

Another popular trend is spicing up your thank you notes with a truly personal thank you! Bring a sign to the wedding and make sure your photographer snaps you posing with it! When you’re married and settled, you’ll have the photos printed on some cards and bam! — personalized thank you notes.

There are lots of cute moves and signs you can execute in front of the camera. Here are some favs!

At the reception, there are lots of great opportunities to spice up the party with some signs. From the cake and candy bar to the bride and groom chairs, feel free to accessorize where you see fit.

Since photo booths are a fun asset to a wedding reception, take advantage and do some signage there, too!

I also love the concept of sharing your love story! You don’t have to write a novel. Just include bulleted facts and dates of how you two developed into youtwo.

Cardstock and wood seem to be popular choices for signs, but chalk boards are also the current trend to communicate with your guests. They are all really aesthetically pleasing, so you can’t go wrong.

When Motel the Tailor and Tzeitel got married in Fiddler on the Roof, they didn’t have a website. After they tied the knot, they revealed their pride and joy, Motel’s new sewing machine, and while that sewing machine was pretty snazzy for 19th century Old Country, the sewing machine was their only piece of technology and it did nothing for their own piece of real estate on the web. That’s probably because there was no web except for the ones built by spiders, but I digress. I wouldn’t want a sewing machine to make clothes anyway. Hel-lo? That’s what Nordstrom and Bloomies is for!

So, here’s what I say: don’t act like you’re a babushka-wearing, cow-milking, old school, nice Jewish girl. Welcome to the 2000s. You’re a modern, mainstream bride! Create a wedding website. Why? Here are the top 5 reasons!

1. Learn About The Couple!
It’s unlikely that 100% of your guests will know each of you intimately. Here’s your big chance to share who you are and other obvious reasons why you love one another. The more details, the better! I personally enjoy reading about the bride and groom (or the bride and bride or groom and groom — whatever!) and like when details about their background and current lives are included in the write ups. If your Uncle Murray hasn’t seen you since you tap danced in the talent show at the Catskills family reunion and he’s never met your fiance, here’s where he can make up for lost time before attending your wedding.

2. Registry Information
You’re going to get presents for your wedding and it doesn’t suck. For those who decide not to cut a check, you’ll receive something tangible, but if you’re taking the time to register, you may as well make sure people know about the coveted list. Your website is the perfect place to house this precious information as it automatically links to the stores’ sites and your registry. Two clicks and your Internet savvy friends and family are on their way to gifting your gravy boat. Groovy. Where does registry information NOT go? Your wedding invitation! It’s a no-no. And since your registry information should be included on your wedding website, the wedding website should not be on the formal invitation. I know, I know, here I am preaching the registry gospel, and I’m telling you to leave it off the formal invitation. It can be on shower invites, save the dates, and even rehearsal dinner mailers. And if you must include the website in the formal invitation suite, put it on a separate card, but never on the actual invitation with the “Mr. & Mrs. So and So invite you to the marriage of their daughter” yada yada part. It’s considered pandering for presents. Otherwise, go nuts posting your wedding URL on all other methods of communication. And enjoy your registered gifts!

3. Personalize Your Style
Many wedding websites come with options to customize the artwork and format in which details are displayed. This is a great opportunity to give a clue about the style or theme of your wedding. Other than the formal invitation or save the date, there are really no other pieces that wedding guests see to clue them into what your wedding might be like. A formal black tie wedding might have a clean and elegant website design. Likewise, a rustic, vintage, shabby chic event might be a little more casual and flowery online. Here’s one more place you can tie in your colors, style, and personal touches like a logo or quote.

4. Talk Up Your Wedding Party
You didn’t rent bridesmaids and groomsmen, right? They are people that you actually know and even like, correct? So gush about them! Include a list of your wedding party and maybe even write up a blurb about them. Go the extra mile and include photos. They’re the supporting players in your big debut as husband and wife, so make sure they have a little time in the spotlight. Plus, they’ll be VIP the day of the wedding and your guests might want to know a little about the people who make you happy and keep you from going meshuga.

5. Details Of Your Big Day
Just in case your disorganized pals lose your $4.00 invitation (grrrr), they can at least get the must-know details of your wedding day online from anywhere. Make sure to include your date, location or locations (if there are separate venues for ceremony and reception places), time of ceremony (usually the time on the invitation should be about 30 minutes before the actual walk-down-the-aisle-it’s-go-time-there’s-no-turning-back-now time), and dress preferences like black tie or resort wear. Your out-of-towners will especially appreciate hotel information and if there are room blocks you’ve set up for them. The details of such accommodations should be included on the website. Your guests will thank you for making it less stressful to attend your wedding. I mean, travel these days is so annoying. Aunt Marilyn will be too busy worrying about condensing her Jean Nate body splash in a 3 ounce bottle in her carry on. Don’t make her start kvetching about how she doesn’t know if there’s a group rate at the Marriott. All of these details are a must. Additional details like local airports, transportation options, popular destinations and things to do are great additions to your wedding website.

Do a quick Internet search to find out about wedding websites. There are many free resources available (6. another reason to create one: it’s usually freeeee!) and The Wedding Yentas loves the many great sites on MyWedding. There’s even an option for designs inspired by your favorite Jewish wedding planning website (ahem!) so, ya know, you might want to check that out.

Have fun with your website and enjoy your own little piece of property on the web!

Small weddings. There’s something so romantic and special about being part of an event that has an exclusive guestlist and all focus on the bride and groom. Whether it’s for economical reasons or for destination wedding desires, intimate nuptials are big in popularity. Why?

1. The most special day you’ll experience with your partner will be spent among only your nearest and dearest! Whittling down your people means you have fewer guests who are extraneous or friends of relatives you hardly know. It’s all about the quality instead of the quantity!
2. Ahh… you can breathe! Fewer people means less pressure. Because of the small amount of guests, your wedding day jitters will likely shrink down to little to none. This is because you won’t have seemingly-foreign eyes on you. Among your closest friends and favorite family, you should feel much more relaxed. No dog and pony show for your VIPs. Just party on in a fancy dress! Om to that!
3. Cha-ching! You’re saving money, friends! Who doesn’t like that? Fewer people means fewer homes to send invitations (which means fewer postage stamps); Fewer tables means fewer centerpieces or printed menus at each place setting; Fewer people means fewer favors and that means fewer labels with your logo to stick on such favors. See where I’m going with this? It’s not just saving on the catering bill. It’s saving on every element that would normally be attached to a guest.
4. Go big! If you’re on a budget, I would strongly advise you don’t cut corners and, rather, you cut people. You can still have a high-end, beautiful wedding supported by top-notch vendors if you declutter your guestlist. Want to splurge on your dream photographer? Want to indulge in a gourmet meal that stands out from your usual banquet chicken-and-‘tatoes grub? You can when you don’t have to pay for so many people!
5. With a smaller wedding, you have more choices in selecting a venue. Since you won’t need to accommodate a large amount of people in a space, you could get married in some really unique and cool locations. Art galleries, boutique restaurants, university libraries… you can have a more personal experience in a unique location.
6. You can actually schmooze with your guests! You are inviting all your favorite people, right? So that means you can actually talk to them! It’s always so sad when the bride and groom miss out on face time with the people who’ve come to celebrate them. I know I missed out on seeing some people at my 162-person wedding and I STILL feel guilty about it! The day goes by fast, no matter how many people you invite. Big wedding, small wedding — the day flies by. You’ll want to be able to steal a hug from the people you love and if you have a smaller guest list, you’ll be able to get as many squeezes as you’d like!
7. People will remember your wedding! Because it won’t follow the cookie-cutter format that most large weddings employ, your guests will recall it was a unique day, representative of you as a couple! For people who get around the seasonal wedding circuit, weddings can become fairly assembly line-like and very predictable. That’s not necessarily a bad thing — chocolate cake is pretty predictable and it’s delicious every time — but it is nice to stand out and make a mark, especially on a day that’s yours.
8. Save some money for later! If you’re contributing to your own wedding, either fully or partially, you already know that you’re spending on one amazing day. But it really is one day. One. Ouch. That’s a lot of cash to spend on 1/365th of a year. If cash is tight — and these days, it’s likely everyone’s holding their wallets a little more tightly — you’ll want to save on your wedding with an intimate guestlist so that you have more funds for your honeymoon, a house, or a rainy day.

Weddings of all shapes and sizes are truly special in their own way, but if you’re on the fence about whether to have a large wedding or a smaller sized event, hopefully this list helped make your decision a little easier. A small wedding can still have a big heart, and when it’s all over, it’s all about the two most important guests of honor: you and your b’shert!